Wednesday, November 16, 2011
The following eleven "sayings" appear as written in Jay Wiseman's classic text, SM101. All credit goes to Jay and his noted sources. As an introduction to the wild, woolly world of BDSM, there's a lot of wisdom in these nuggets of advice. Here's the list:
1. You almost never get into serious trouble by going too slowly.
2. SM is something you do with someone, not something you do to someone.
3. If it's going to go bad, it usually goes bad in isolation.
4. Introduce one new thing at a time, preferably only one new thing during a session.
5. If you want to know what they're into, watch their eyes. They can't fake the eyes.
6. Harder is not necessarily better. Faster is not necessarily better. More often is not necessarily better. More elaborate is not necessarily better. More expensive is not necessarily better.
7. Beware the trap of over-eagerness.
8. Think with your head.
9. How someone will react to erotic bondage is one thing. How they will react to erotic submission is a second, separate reaction. How they will react to erotic pain in a third.
10. Experience it yourself before you do it to someone else.
11. If you want to know what you're into, take a close look at what you're fantasizing about just before you come while masturbating.
There are more nuggets like these from Jay on the list, but I didn't want to overwhelm.