Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Speaking of enjoying, this book has gotten some nice reviews! Angela at Sizzling Hot Book Reviews gave it 4 hearts!
Amy at the Romance Studio also gave it 4 hearts.
I am so tickled they liked it, and I got such a kick reading the book through their comments. There's a gift you can give all your favorite authors for the holidays - leave a review on Goodreads or the site where you bought the book. That's the best part of writing (next to royalty checks, of course!), hearing from the readers who enjoy your books.
Happy Holidays to you all! May Santa leave you a naughty toy or two, and a sexy playmate to enjoy it with. I wish you all a safe holiday.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Looking for one concentrated place to find good kinky books? There's a fairly newish review site out there specializing in reviews for BDSM books. BDSM Book Reviews. The reviewers themselves are kinky folks, so you know they're interested in these stories.
Okay, I'm particularly partial to this new site because they've just reviewed Fettered Love and given it 4 out of 5 Paddles. (Thank you Michele) But in this day and age of fragmented attention and a bazillion places to look for the perfect reading material, it helps to have a dedicated place to go if you crave one particular sub-genre.
Here's a snippet from my review:
"I enjoyed this story and the characters had depth and dimension. The depth that Kirk and Evan's love is consuming in and out of the dungeon. The BDSM scenes are descriptive and intense, but rational for the intensity supported throughout the story."
Several other stories in our 1-800 series have been reviewed at this site (Emerald Dungeon by Kathy Kulig and Needing Harte by Marilu Mann) so check them out. Who knows, maybe a few more of our books have slipped in without me knowing.
Take care and happy reading.
Safe, sane and consensual,
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
The following eleven "sayings" appear as written in Jay Wiseman's classic text, SM101. All credit goes to Jay and his noted sources. As an introduction to the wild, woolly world of BDSM, there's a lot of wisdom in these nuggets of advice. Here's the list:
1. You almost never get into serious trouble by going too slowly.
2. SM is something you do with someone, not something you do to someone.
3. If it's going to go bad, it usually goes bad in isolation.
4. Introduce one new thing at a time, preferably only one new thing during a session.
5. If you want to know what they're into, watch their eyes. They can't fake the eyes.
6. Harder is not necessarily better. Faster is not necessarily better. More often is not necessarily better. More elaborate is not necessarily better. More expensive is not necessarily better.
7. Beware the trap of over-eagerness.
8. Think with your head.
9. How someone will react to erotic bondage is one thing. How they will react to erotic submission is a second, separate reaction. How they will react to erotic pain in a third.
10. Experience it yourself before you do it to someone else.
11. If you want to know what you're into, take a close look at what you're fantasizing about just before you come while masturbating.
There are more nuggets like these from Jay on the list, but I didn't want to overwhelm.
Friday, October 28, 2011
Writing BDSM fiction has been a writer’s journey for me, talking with authors who write in the genre, reading non-fiction and fiction books. There certainly is an ‘edge’ to these stories that I like and writing them well is not easy. I’ve enjoyed reading all of the 1-800-DOM-help books. There’s a similar thread that these books share but each author has taken a very unique twist. Each one explored a different area of the lifestyle too. All of them great reads!
A well-crafted BDSM scene is an adrenaline rush, euphoric, and arousing for the reader and the writer. Author Susie Bright in her non-fiction book “How to Write a Dirty Story” says that once you’ve hit your zone and you’re writing the perfect erotic scene, it’s like, “an orgasmic cocktail.”
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
I was thinking this morning about what might convey the feeling, intensity or personal meaning of BDSM in a way that is accessible for those not in the lifestyle. The word "poetry" popped into my mind. As a writer I've dabbled in my own poetry (admittedly stone-age quality) to explore emotion. I decided to do a quick search on the web for BDSM or D/s poetry links. Here's what I got. Check it out.
#submission efnet bdsm chat
Poetry, like prose, touches the soul in a way that dry description cannot. It is a window to our inner playground. I hope to spend some time in the future creating my own D/s poetry. Here's to future projects!
Safe, sane and consensual,
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
I'm so excited to announce I'm in edits for Fighting for Control and may have a release date to announce soon! In the meantime, here's a sample to whet your appetitite:
The golden god—Brad, she was certain—moved behind her and she twisted to see what he was doing. He stood at the table with the toys on it, but she couldn’t turn far enough to tell what he was up to. She heard him shift something around, and then he approached, standing so close she felt his breath on her shoulders.
“You want to learn if someone can fill your needs without being asked, right?” he said.
“Yes, Master C.”
“Be free to enjoy an evening without planning it all yourself?”
“Yes Master.” He was describing her wants practically word for word from her list. Hearing him speak them aloud made her understand submission as Mistress Marla described it. Lori wasn’t bending to someone else’s desires, she was looking for someone who matched her needs. Finding the man who wanted what she was willing to give, and who was willing to give in return.
“Tonight is not about taking orders, being told what to do. It’s about not giving orders. Do you understand the difference?” Marc, Master Q, asked.
“Tell me the difference.”
“I’m not going to tell you what I want you to do. I’m going to trust that I’ll be satisfied by what you decide to do.”
Something as soft as a whisper brushed across her shoulders and she gasped. What a sensation, like butterfly kisses flitting across her skin. Master C swept the tool back and forth on her upper back. His gravelly voice heated her insides. “Pleasure comes in many ways. The entire body is a sex organ if you let it be. Close your eyes and focus on the feeling of the feather.”
She did. The feather stroked down her shoulder and up her raised arm, and returned to repeat the trip on the other arm. A wake of gooseflesh flowed outward from the touch. He circled her, moving to her chest—first the flat upper part, then skirting the slopes pushed up by the bustier. Her nipples tightened as her areolas wrinkled, the rest of her breasts swelling. The leather top grew uncomfortable as she filled the cups completely. Automatically she tugged her right arm to reach for the zipper, wanting to feel the feather on the rest of her breasts.
Realization that she wanted to bare her breasts to Brad made her freeze. She tried to put him out of her mind and focus again on the feather.
“Stop fighting it. That won’t get you anywhere. Relax and let us work. For now, just feel. Do you like it?”
“Yes Sir.” She wasn’t sure who spoke, since she still had her eyes closed. It sounded more like Marc's buttery-smooth tones. Both men orbited continuously around her. She heard their shoes squeak on the floor, became aware of their shifting energy, but only one continued to touch her, if only through the feather.
That changed when the constraint of her bustier released as the zipper lowered. Sucking in her stomach, she straightened. The need building in her from the feather on her chest evaporated at the thought of being seen by both men. She licked her lips to keep from speaking.
The bustier fell away and the men’s breathing audibly altered. The shorter, faster breaths made her feel sexy. They liked what they saw. Could she open her eyes yet? She needed to see their reactions.
Braving punishment, she blinked. Neither man was in front of her. She bit her lower lip. So much for her ego. No one was looking at her breasts. She twisted again to see what they were doing.
“Pleasure can be reached by many routes,” said Brad as he walked around and stood in front of her.
In the true spirit of torture, I mean, anticipation, I leave you here and get back to my edits. Enjoy!
Monday, October 17, 2011
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
And I might as well admit right now that I have no photos from our group presentation which we lovingly entitled BDSM from Top to Bottom. There are many amazing and tantalizing photos from Romanticon floating around the web so I'm sure you can find something to sate your appetite. If any other group members captured a photo during our seminar please feel free to chime in and post it.
ATTENTION: REVISION ALERT!!! I do indeed have a seminar picture thanks to the lovely Cris Anson (www.crisanson.com) who heard my plea and sent an image she captured at our event.
And here's the same unrelated random conference pic for good measure before moving on with things.
The 1-800 seminar.
Short version. It went well.
Longer version. Del Dryden was a very good sport as I tried my hand in a flogging demo in front of the seminar crowd. Her ass and shoulders got a good dose of my leather flogger while both of us chatted with the crowd, answering questions about the experience and other BDSM lifestyle issues. Del did indeed report the experience left her feeling relaxed. The flogging was the grand finale after my earlier presentation on various roles in the lifestyle and how the BDSM portrayed in our fiction stacks up to real life. After that serious note, Allie Standifer gave a rather amusing and fascinating description of her trip to a BDSM club last spring during the RT convention in Los Angeles. You might have read about her trip on our blog a few months ago. Francesca Hawley passed out an awesome list of research resources for audience members who wanted to know more about BDSM for writing or personal interests. And finally, we finished with the flogging.
The one disappointment is that we ran out of time to play the amazing BDSM Jeopardy game that Kathy Kulig created for the occasion. Despite no winning contestant we did pick a random name from seminar attendees to win the kinky gift basket we had prepared.
We are holding the game in reserve for next year's Romanticon, so register and show up to compete using all of your BDSM expertise.
People attended our presentation for a variety of reasons. Some came because they want to write BDSM romance fiction. Some were simply curious to learn more about the lifestyle, and enjoy reading kinky erotic romance although it is not their personal thing. And others because they had genuine questions about the experience from their own interest in exploring this alternative lifestyle choice. I love that about Romanticon. It's a place where it's fine to discuss all sorts of sexuality, to be interested in reading about it, writing it, and to acknowledge, if one is comfortable, ones own personal sexual leanings. Or not. It's all good.
On a positive note, the new 1-800-DOM-help anthology, Dial B for Bondage, including stories from Kathy Kulig, Delilah Devlin, Francesca Hawley and Samantha Cayto, sold remarkably well at the Book Signing. Look for more anthologies from our series in the future.
In short, Romanticon was a blast. Join us next year.
Safe, sane and consensual,
Friday, September 23, 2011
Thinking about this whole shindig recently prompted me to add "glutton for punishment" to my Twitter profile (I was totally talking about homeschooling my pre-teen but we'll just pretend it's about the whole smacking deal). Because I really am looking forward to it, particularly to finding out how a flogging feels when it's delivered by somebody OTHER than the person who's been delivering them for lo these many years. And it's also a very relaxing activity for me (no, seriously) although I don't know how relaxing I'll find it in front of a room full of people. I have no problem with public speaking, or with acting on a stage, but the only time I've ever done anything BDSM-related in public was in a stage production of The Rocky Horror Picture Show (and I was portraying a naughty-schoolteacher dominatrix. Seriously).
My main concern in all this? Well, as I'm going to have the aforementioned roomful of people looking in the vicinity of my tush, my big worry is finding/borrowing a pair of pants that don't make my ass look weird and/or lumpy. Other than that I'm pretty cool with it.
As long as nobody actually calls me Sally.
Monday, September 19, 2011
I found a very brief quiz which I thought was fun.
The BDSM Selector will tell you if you're vanilla, a top, bottom, sub, Dom(me) or whatever. I rated as bottom, followed by slave/sub/switch. There was such a large gap between responses, however, that I must research the difference.
I would love to hear your results if you take the test, and whether or not you feel they're true. Come on, 'fess up!
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Friday, August 26, 2011
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
|Does an Alpha male truly lose control and power if he submits?|
As I write Leather Becomes Her, my story is of a dominant woman meeting her submissive, but the submissive hero in the book is NOT a beta. My question is, can a man who is Alpha be submissive? Does submission change his role from Alpha to beta?
Alpha men can be macho to the world. You'd be surprised at how the power wielding men of society prefer to be brought down in private by submitting. (And some PAY professional Dominants to do it. It has nothing to do with sex, just submission.) They aren't less Alpha for doing it; their ability to submit makes them stronger. Imagine the lawyer in court fighting a hard case, arguing for his client, butting heads with judges, lawyers, police, etc. Every day, all day, long hours into late nights, week in and week out. They aren't out to please anyone. They want their way in all things. Win, win, win. These are men of sheer power and dominance--total Alpha males. Many times what does this kind of man wish for in private? Release. The joy of not making any decisions. Letting someone else take control and use him so he can relax. His only desire--to please a dominant figure (in my example, a Mistress).
So does submitting make an Alpha role switch to beta? (Urban Dictionary defines beta male as "An unremarkable, careful man who avoids risk and confrontation. Beta males lack the physical presence, charisma and confidence of the Alpha male.")
I don't think submission makes an Alpha man weak. I know quite a few Alpha personalities, men and women, who enjoy submission. Submission doesn't make one weak. It takes a lot of strength to let go taboos, outward appearances and expectations.
Imagine the lawyer again, all conservative looking...strip off his outer layers (suit) and bare him naked. What do you see? Toned muscles? Tattoos? (Okay, my personal preference there...ahem.) He still looks macho yet he immediately feels vulnerable. Does he want to run? Yes. Will he? No. Why? Because he has strength to keep him there as his Mistress desires. His urge to please Her overwhelms everything else. He will take whatever She desires--whip to the back, spanking over the knee, bondage, clothespins to the cock and balls, cleaning her house, licking her feet, etc. He doesn't say no. He doesn't shove Her away. He wants to please Her. That takes strength!
Once his service is complete, he is once again in control. Wait? Did he really lose control? He was controlled by Her, but he had a choice. He remained subservient. Did he have to? No. Isn't his choice to remain at her feet really just internal control as opposed to external?
He was released from his worldy responsibilities and outer appearance as the dominant male of power. His external control was stripped away like the clothes from his body, however, he internalized his power and strength to serve his Mistress, whatever her desire.
So, in my opinion, an Alpha male remains Alpha. He never loses strength or control, he merely changes the focus from outward power and strength in succeeding (money, career, education, etc) to internal control from running away like a coward.